Ask any dad what their favorite room of the house is. I guarantee a not so surprisingly large amount of dads will tell you their favorite room is the bathroom. Sounds odd I know, but there is a very good reason.
It’s not because of the tooth paste splattered mirror. And it’s definitely not because of the froofy decorative towels. It’s because as a dad, the bathroom is the one place that gives a man total privacy and protection from little sticky, whiny monsters usually referred to as CHILDREN.
A man on the can is surrounded only by his thoughts. His only concern is the increasing numbness in the legs. That is assuming you’ve taking the proper precautions to ensure an uninterrupted, relaxing experience.
The first step to your very own porcelain sanctuary is to invest in a sturdy door lock, and use it. Nothing slams you back into reality quicker than a two year old barging in with your pants around your ankles. Double check or even triple check the lock before parking your behind.
The second step to ceramic serenity is to use the exhaust fan to your advantage. Your wife will think you’re being considerate, but really it’s to give you the illusion of being alone, perhaps on a toilet, in the middle of the jungle, next to a raging waterfall.
The third step is the most important. It can mean the difference between an entertaining break from reality, and reading the back of the shampoo bottle. Bring your smart phone. It’s a little known fact that this was Steve Jobs’ reason behind the iPhone. Hundreds of games and the internet in the palm of your hand provides you with an infinite amount of entertainment until your legs fall asleep.
And there you go, follow these three easy steps and your too can turn your bathroom into your private oasis.
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